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Apr. 13th, 2010

I don't know if i made the right decision.
I sent my deposit to Tufts, but I don't know.
This girl who knew me since elementary school got in too, and is probably going. We were best friends in 4th grade, until she just...broke it off. Which was kind of bitchy of her I guess. I felt so betrayed. Yeah I was weird back then, and now everyone talks about how nice she is...but...I don't know. Shes friendly and all, knows how to stand up for herself, and definitely has a bitchy side.
And while shes smart and deserves it...I wanted to put my past behind me. Start over fresh. But with her there...ugh. Oh well...there are over a thousand freshman, we probably won't see each other much. And she might have applied to the college of engineering, while I will probably major in psych.
It's not that I completely dislike her, I'm pretty indifferent to her now. But she's just a reminder of how awkward I was a kid, and I don't want to think about that in college.

Wesleyan...didn't give me as much money, and is farther away. Yet I sometimes wonder if I would fit in with the hipsters/hippies. Then again...they're a lot of artists. They're into drugs and shit. That would make me feel really awkward, as I am lame/boring and try to stay away from those mind-altering substances. I like to stay in control of my mind and body, thank you very much. Part of me feels like I'm missing out. On paper, Wesleyan is higher rated/ranked than Tufts, but people i've talked to...agree that Tufts is a better school anyway. Sure Wesleyan is this artsy, liberal school...and I would be happy there, but my mother is paying and Tufts surprisingly gave me a better deal. And I wouldn't have to worry about transportation...and I would be near the city. Katherine is going to MIT nearby, and we shall visit each other a lot, I hope. It'd be nice to have someone I know close by. I guess...Dr. Traver and Dr. Sumner both raved at how it has one of the best pre-med programs in the country.

Which leads to my next doubt. Do I still want to go into medicine? I feel like I was meant for it, but...I am terrible at science. I don't need much calculus, and I can handle that. Physics...one year...sure. Chemistry...I'm not doing so well now, which makes me doubt myself. Oh well. I think I can do it. Then again...if that doesn't end up happening, I'd probably go to grad school and go into psychotherapy. Psychology is awesome. And I think Tufts has a great program. Sure, Wesleyan seems like a better school on paper, but it just feels so secluded.

I hope I made the right choice.

Comments

( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
no_good_deed44
Apr. 14th, 2010 02:58 am (UTC)
I remember feeling just like this last spring (has it already been a year? Time flies faster than you want it to.), and I have to tell you, I honestly believe that you end up where you're supposed to be no matter what. I doubted my choice for a while and even now, I'm not totally happy with my school in all aspects. But I've met people here that I would never want my life to be without. So no matter what, know that it will work out.
xxfromthisdayon
Apr. 14th, 2010 08:24 pm (UTC)
:)
I agree with that...people end up where they're meant to go...meet certain people.
Glad you're enjoying school! Now hopefully I'll feel the same way next year...
carla_flydance
Apr. 14th, 2010 05:52 am (UTC)
THe problem of choice is definetely the hardest one) But sure you solve it...
( 3 comments — Leave a comment )